Baby Update

A mom never wants to get a phone a week after having blood taken at a prenatal appointment. They only call when something is wrong, never to congratulate you for having great blood work or for gaining only two pounds in four weeks.

We got such a call last Wednesday and the timing could not have been worse. I had taken Colby to a Build-a-Bear class and about ten other moms had the same idea. Crowded space, crazed children, and obnoxious music playing over the loud speaker. I couldn’t find a quiet corner but could make out enough to understand the weight of the moment: “Quad screen blood work. Down syndrome – fine. Spina bifida – fine. Trisomy 18 – positive. Sending you upstairs to see the high-risk specialist.”

The room whirled and I couldn’t even articulate a question, didn’t know what questions to ask, and felt like the room had turned upside down while the weight of my feet kept me planted. Blinking back tears and trying to occupy Colby with a stuffed military bear, I called Brad and tried to put the pieces together for him.

Inhale. Focus. Faith.

I committed to limit my internet research and especially not visit pages with pictures of children with Edwards Syndrome (trisomy 18 defect). At the three sites I briefly glanced, I found the information we needed: the test is an indicator of risk and not a diagnosis, only 11% of women who have the positive test actually have a baby with the defect, and most sobering, it’s a fatal disease with most children not living past age 1, if they survive childbirth.

A week later, I walked into the specialist’s office and wondered what kind of change my afternoon would hold.

Genetic Counselor. God is my counselor.
High-risk Specialist. God is the author of Life. He is the perfecter of my faith. He knew we would be sitting in this room before the beginning of time and He sits here with us now.
Level 2 Ultrasound. He is knitting this baby together and creating his inmost being.

It’s a boy. A healthy baby boy without a single trace of a genetic malformation. Head shape: normal. Heart chambers: normal. Function of hands and feet: normal. Growth rate: normal. Heart Defects: none. No cleft lip. No swelling around his head. Praise the Lord.

For us, the suffering was limited to a “what-if” scenario and we were kept from having to walk through a deeper trial. His goodness would not have waivered had the ultrasound shown all the markers for the syndrome. His craftsmanship doesn’t stop when He creates babies to have physical imperfections and His promises are certainly not void when an earthly life lasts only a few short days, weeks, or months. He is good. His love endures forever.

And we can’t wait to introduce you to this baby boy sometime in February.

Catching Up...

I can hardly believe I haven't blogged since February but dates don't lie and it's really been 5 months. Sadness. I have moments when I think of some fantastic blog topic but it's rarely at a moment I can actually sit down at the computer. And, if I'm really honest, I will tell you that I've been weaning myself from technology. I'll explain later but for now, here are my random thoughts of late:

Total Irritation

There are several things frustrating me at the moment but here is the first on my list: Downfall. It's the newest game show on ABC and it bugs the heck out of me. The basic premise of the show is that contestants are in a rush against time to answer trivia questions. Rather than just "losing" the amazing prizes, audiences watch the actual items progress down a conveyor belt that eventually drops items off the side of a building. Crashing to complete obliteration. Fascinating to watch but disgusting to think about the value that some of those items might have for families in today's economic times. Brand new appliances. Pianos. Techie juke boxes. And new cars. Do you know how many families in America could have their lives changed by one of those prizes? ABC boasts itself as "A Better Community" but this is far from supporting local lives. Ugh.

Pay-Off

I have subscribed over the years to dozens of email newsletters & updates, in the hopes of getting great coupons and deals. I have often been excited to receive member-only invitations, coupons that don't require a purchase of the Sunday paper, and other deals in my inbox. Most recently, I received an invitation from Dove to become a Dove Ambassador, which I eagerly said "Sign me up!" Here's the scoop: Dove has introduced a new product (Daily Treatment Conditioner) and sent me an amazing package including the full-size product and five samples to give to girlfriends. There were coupons (!!) and I was blown away by such an extreme gesture. I mean, I expect the little "tear-open-with-your-teeth-in-the-shower" samples but this was exactly what I would have purchased at the store. The product is thick and creamy, made my hair look and feel so healthy, and the smell was divine. Love the program, love the product. Way to go, Dove.

Morning Sickness Tips from a Real Mom

Some of you may know that we're pregnant and expecting baby #3 in February. I hit the ten-week mark yesterday and that came with a typical day of "getting sick" (always with one kid hovering over my shoulder), an appetite that doesn't allow ANYthing to sound good EVER, and just the plain irritation of feeling like shit all day. Oops. Sorry. There's just not another word that does this feeling justice. My husband has picked up all household chores as my capacity currently keeps me on the couch if I'm not doing the essentials: making sure my kids don't starve, keeping diapers from leaking, and trips to the bathroom.

So here are a few things that actually make the worst moments a little more manageable, starting with my favorite:

1. Problem: Hungry for something but nothing sounds good. Solution: Stock up on a HUGE variety of frozen meals (I prefer Lean Cuisine and try to get them on sale). Here's the secret: when nothing sounds good, variety is the key. I can choose from chicken alfredo, macaroni and cheese, or santa fe rice & beans. Or lasagna. Or turkey tetrazzini. I sometimes opt for things I wouldn't touch other days and it's ready in 6-7 minutes or less. Problem solved.
2. Problem: Overwhelming smells. Solution: Invest in your favorite candles and keep them lit all day. To walk past my favorite Slatkin & Company candle (Pineapple Orchid), gives me, even if just for 5 seconds, total serenity. It's like I forget I'm pregnant!
3. Problem: Zero Productivity. Solution: Pride yourself in the little things. I had a day a couple weeks ago where I started a load of laundry and it was like Christmas! I was so excited to have found 15 minutes of feeling normal and took advantage of it. I bragged on myself to my sweet husband and just felt good for having accomplished such a little task! Moms: your super human gift is making babies - don't be hard on yourself! God is great when we are weak.

(insert Dr. Pepper craving)

Final Thought

I told you I would explain my disinterest in technology and here it is in a nutshell: Does your computer or iPhone make you a better or worse mom? For me, there is no neutral in this subject and I wonder if it's really this way for most of us. I have been found more than guilty of becoming consumed by Facebook for hours a day, placing checking my email above my kids, and falling into the ugliness of my own escape. Facebook lately has just disgusted me...actually, let me rephrase that: I've seen such pride, judgment, etc. on Facebook from women who could spend their time better. Nobody really cares about your status getting updated every 15 minutes and YOUR KIDS DON'T CARE EITHER!!! I can't quite convince myself to delete my account but I've cut it out of my daily routine. What's holding you? When your kids picture you in their minds, is it with an iPhone in hand or sitting at the computer? Come on, ladies!

Okay, so that's enough ranting for one afternoon. And certainly controversial enough for a long overdue blog update. Live your life!!!